Why Your Ass Was Deleted

            Social networks, that electronic way of catching up with old friends, family, ex partners or people that share the same interests as you. That kind of sums up everything from the bowels of MySpace to Google+. Side note; YOU still have a MySpace, ha ha ha. Ok, sorry about that, MySpace was cool once upon a time. I know some of you are having a hard time removing yourself because of the simplistic nature of the site. Now, getting back to reality; did you friend the same people from one network to the other? Did you find yourself removing friends between transitioning or adding new networks?

            Being involved with any social network is like a big block party. If you don’t like what’s going on, you can take your ball and go home. The big difference is we tend to treat that like a major break up of some sorts. If we remove someone from one of our pages, the removed person gets a little touchy about it. Hell it’s the internet, get over it already! Just the opposite occurs if you are the one removing a person first. It’s like we get to gloat a little and say “ha, I took that person off my page, I’m a bad ass”. Truth be told, did you really want that person on your page or were you just going for the numbers because everyone else was doing it?

            Now, this is where I’m different. I’ll remove AND block a person with the thought of screw you, you haven’t changed much since I first met you. Love it!!!! Let’s get to some truths here, well, at least my truths… You’re an ex boyfriend that hasn’t been seen since sixth grade, you reconnect and the first thing that comes into a chat is “It’s been a long time (duh!) I’ve been married, divorced with x amount of kids. So are you seeing anyone?” Seriously, this has happened more than once. My reaction…that’s why your ass was deleted! Then there’s the ex fiancé who pops up every couple of years and feels that because he’s on your page, you’re back to a relationship….oops, deleted and blocked. Somehow reconnecting gets misconstrued as rekindling a childhood fling and almost always will get a person removed.

            I’ve moved friends from one site to the next only to end up removing them altogether. Sometimes being wirelessly connected has a way of reminding you that some people haven’t changed in all these years. There’s always that one person that starts friending everyone yet no one remembers who that person is. It’s funny and it’s happened. Those you don’t really delete, you just move them to a list that you rarely look at. You may not remember them, but sometimes they put up interesting things. There are the ones no one really cared for, but they’ve rediscovered their lost souls and shout the Gospel; your ass was still removed. Religion, like tears, doesn’t move me. There was one person who got upset by what I said about a nameless person and decided to tell me quite publicly why they were deleting me. Damn, I forgot to shed a tear, my bad. That was coming from someone that no one really talked to in the first place, explain the loss there. Oh snap MY ass was deleted!!!!

            What makes this whole “my playground” scenario so funny is the thought that we have to explain why we’re deleting someone. I’m guilty of it for sure, don’t think you are? If you say “I’m cleaning out my page it’s about that time…” Or, “I’m getting tired of seeing certain people complain all the time, guess I need to clean up my page” then you’re guilty as well. So, not only have we felt obligated to add people we hardly ever spoke to, we feel obligated to expound as to a cause of their removal. Sadly, we’ve become a whiny bunch of people who feel that everyone has to like them. Back to grade school we go, come on get on the big yellow. Ok, for some of you the short yellow.

            My all time favorite for deleting people????? A person friends people on my list they don’t know and try to sell them things. That is the ultimate way to be removed. It is one thing if you want to hawk your wares, but using someone else’s page to do it warrants an immediate ejection. I’ve had two instances of that, one had to be removed and blocked from any site I’m associated with and the other…well…..let’s just say I took a little too much pleasure in the fact that the little pyramid scheme blew up in their face. Yes, that’s mean to say, but meanness overcomes ignorance.  Hmmm, I thought that sounded good. Oh well, be warned, don’t try to sell your stuff through my page.

            If you’re one that feels the need to be a bummer every day, you’ll see.  If you’re one that never responds when people write you saying how busy you are yet you’re always online, you’ll see. If you’re the type that friends people because everyone else did, you’ll see. If you think just because you all went to the same school that makes you friends, you’ll see. If you can’t find a person’s post after a few days, you’ll see. If you’re one that thinks reconnecting means someone wants something more, you’ll see. If you’re one that doesn’t understand tongue and cheek humor, you’ll see. Now, what the heck will you all see???? Why your ass was deleted. ~ Just my two cents